Patterns • Manifestation

Patterns hold invaluable gifts when it comes to Manifesting. They allow you to track a number of things or people showing up in your life, and if undesirable, they are truly your mirror to pinpoint what inside of you continues to attract them. Once you discover what it is and shift it, the next versions of this pattern that show up serve as your tests, which signals that the greater thing you’ve been asking for are ready to come through.

A great example of this was when I was between the ages of 23-25. I had DREADFUL relationship modeling from both of my young parents, their interactions with their partners, and how each treated one another. On top of that, I had significantly low self-worth. It was apparent in all aspects of my life: shitty cocktailing job where I was treated poorly, broke because I wasn’t expanded financially in any sense having grown up with a belief structure of lack, an apartment with cockroaches, seriously dreadful.  Clients will always hear me say that one thing transcends into all aspects of life. Therefore, it’s no surprise that I was attracting in one emotionally unavailable guy after another. Not only were they emotionally unavailable but I certainly wasn’t their first choice, and they were usually using me. I was over-giving, would sleep with them too quickly, and would allow doormat behavior. I was the definition of, “he’s just not into you.” From famous to hipster to “nice guy”. It didn’t matter.

Before truly understanding my manifestation formula I woke up one morning right before my 25th birthday and got the ping that that was it. I’d never take shit from a guy again. Ever. And it was time to carve out a new relationship modeling for myself, and learn how to value myself above everything else by doing a lot of work. More than that, I turned into what my friend Angela Trimbur refers to as the dating Queen. After that day, I never took another guy’s shit again. I became unapologetically unafraid to walk if even the slightest disrespect was hinted at by a guy. My standards rose immensely, for myself and for them. And it wasn’t long after, that I manifested the exact partner I had been calling in. Verbatim to my list.  

The pattern of men was a reflection of my worth, subconscious belief structure, and standards for myself. It’s so amazing today to look around and not even have men like that in my vicinity. I don’t even cross them on the street anymore or out in public. We are literally vibrating at two completely different energy levels. One isn’t greater than the other, they are just different. Therefore, we don’t attract each other anymore. Because we don’t have anything to mirror and work out in each other anymore.

Another example of this is, I’ve had a knack for attracting in at least one to two crazy women a year. Single white female crazy. Alarming and feeling not safe crazy. It became apparent around the same time I was shifting my energy with men. I had this close new friend that began to slowly start dressing like me, then speaking like me, her stories regarding home life started not adding up to the extent that she had created a false sister and a totally false life. Borderline, sociopath territory. One day I walked into my apartment where she was subletting while I had been away in Europe, and she had bought the exact same materials I was using at the time when I had had an accessories design line with my then partner. He and I were known for a specific pillow we’d make out of canvas, with a black circle in the middle and fringe on the side. She had drawings of pillows with a circle with fringe on the side. She had also told another close friend about her greeting card idea, which was a complete replicate of a business plan my partner and I had had a year before that was thankfully legally protected. A day after, a lot of other stories came to the surface of her lies and the alternate universes she had created. On that day, I communicated all the weird copying, and that it’s not energy I want in my life. And that was it. She was blocked and completely distanced from my life. It was terrifying, painful, and very un-grounding all at the same time. It was the first time I had defined “crazy” and what it means to me. Someone with no sense of identity or self, mental chemical imbalance, questionable relationships and past, adopting another’s look, life, and work, and living in a complete state of denial and disillusionment about it with zero sense of accountability.

And though, I’ve never allowed another “crazy” friend in, one or two “crazy” girls to this extreme do tend to find me still. Early last week, I had a similar awakening happen. I got the ping that it was time to not allow any more in ever. I’ve been manifesting a group of very evolved, authentic, independent, successful, strong women that lack ego; and they’ve been coming in, so that awakening isn’t coincidental. The Universe is literally ready to send them through in full.

It’s not a far stretch as to why crazy women are drawn to me, for the very first person in my life that I loved and worshiped was crazy - my mom. Roles were defined really quickly. I’m the stable perfectionist that cleans up the pieces of crazy and constantly tries to save her. And I spent my whole youth trying to help and fix her. So, I’ve continued to have a soft spot for crazy ever since. But last week I got the ping to fully, and completely have an iron guard boundary against crazy in every facet of my life. And that’s just what I did. I kindly and warmly let ever crazy go.

Now that doesn’t mean that I can be angry with people that possess these qualities, for it truly has nothing to do with them. Furthermore, they are in such a state of denial and suffering that they have to pull themselves out of that, so I feel a lot of sympathy for them having to deal with that suffering. But I also can’t have my energy open to them anymore either. All I can do is reflect on myself and shift what’s attracting them. And it’s an incredible subject matter to work through alongside my UNBLOCKED crew these next eight days.

Let’s look at one last outside example of patterning to inspire the collective consciousness. A client called me a year ago and said that she had, had it. She could no longer continue her waitressing job. The jobs before this had been the same pattern, and she had already been getting her herbal business off the ground. I could tell that The Universe was really supporting her flow and that she was at the perfect ledge to jump off the cliff and leave that old pattern behind. She’s expanded immensely since, done massive work on herself, and is one of my really quick manifestors. Very soon after she left her waitressing job she manifested a program where the government in Canada was offering to fund a handful of entrepreneurs’ new companies while also paying them a full-time salary just to develop their business. She was one of the winners. I mean…

Patterns are such a beautiful mirror and blessing. I love, love, love patterns, and I never resent them. Embrace your patterns. They are a gate to what you are manifesting. Always. They can show up in so many ways: bosses, jobs, similar situations that keep popping up, people, items, emotions, and the list goes on. You are literally being called to a higher level, and to do the work to get there. 

if you're in need of detecting your patterns or individual guidance during the exciting, personal, and delicate process of manifestation, I look forward to connecting over a session.


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